Supporting a Friend Through Burnout Without Overstepping

Far too many people are burning out on work and life. According to burnout statistics, nearly half of all adults have gone through the stress, confusion, and struggle associated with this difficult condition. And it can be especially tough to know what to do when it’s your friend who’s dealing with burnout.

On the one hand, you want to show your unwavering support. On the other hand, you want to be gentle in your approach.

Though it might seem impossible to accomplish those two goals, it’s not. You can offer help while remaining respectful of your BFF’s need for independence, time, and space.

1. Send a smile

People going through burnout may feel isolated but are often hesitant to contact friends. You can make it easier for them to stay in touch by making the first move in a subtle way.

For instance, maybe your friend recently went through a rough patch. In that case, you could search online for the perfect “thinking of you” and sympathy gifts and have them delivered. You’ll be sending a smile, as well as giving them a reason to text or call you. Bonus points if your gift has an element of homespun comfort, such as a bowl of soup or a platter of cookies.

2. Check in regularly

Burnout can make someone less likely to return messages. Try not to take it personally if your bestie goes unusually silent for days. It may just seem too overwhelming to respond.

Basically, your role is to keep the lines of communication open. While you shouldn’t hover,  do check up with your friend, keeping your dialogue light and loving. That way, your buddy will know you’re available.

3. Offer your ear

Listening to someone’s challenges without immediately offering advice can be difficult. However, when your BFF wants to vent, try to be a silent sounding board. Unless your friend asks for your feedback, practice empathy but resist the need to recommend “next steps”.

Of course, you can feel free to give your opinion if you’re asked. But let your friend drive the direction of your conversation. Remember: Burnout can be scary and confusing. Being able to unload on you can minimize the intensity of those feelings.

4. Offer specific help

Your first instinct may be to ask your friend, “How can I help?” There’s just one problem, though. Your friend probably doesn’t have any clue how to take you up on your offer. Consequently, you may miss the opportunity to do good.

A better approach is to be very specific in terms of how you’re willing to show your support. For example, you might ask, “Can I pick up some groceries for you?” or “Do you want some help around the house?” That way, you’re giving concrete options.

5. Encourage exercise

Do you see your friend regularly? You may want to think of ways that you can exercise together. Activity can take away the intensity of burnout symptoms like exhaustion because movement is good for the mind and the body.

To make exercise convenient and fun, present it as a chance to hang out. You could take a hike together or walk your dogs around the neighborhood. Or, you might want to propose visiting a local park or shopping center.

6. Promote self-care

People who are mired in burnout may not take care of themselves like they should. Yet self-care is critical for individuals who are going through a period of burnout. From taking long baths to legitimate therapy sessions, self-care practices can run the gamut — and can be invaluable techniques to reduce the immediate and potentially lasting effects of burnout.

Again, you can initiate some self-care approaches by giving your friend a thoughtful gift. Take a cozy blanket, slippers, and comfort food package, for instance. Each of those items is designed to encourage an atmosphere of self-care and self-love.

7. Find out more information

You may begin to feel overwhelmed if your friend just doesn’t seem to be getting better or is having trouble moving past an episode of burnout. In fact, you could begin to experience signs of burnout as well, especially if you’re very close. And that’s not good for either of you.

To avoid having to deal with a double case of burnout, stay attuned to your own feelings. Seek out information on burnout so you recognize what it looks and feels like. And feel free to get early assistance for you if you realize that you’re on a burnout cycle. Who knows? Your proactivity may spark your friend to look for ways to beat his or her burnout as well.

Knowing how to provide your support for a friend who’s burned out may not feel intuitive. However, you owe it to your bestie to figure out how to be there unconditionally without overstepping your boundaries.